Tuesday 22 June 2021

A Sermon By The Right Reverend Rob Barnes (Non Expert On Just About Everything)

I'm not a Reverend. I expect you've noticed. I mean can you imagine! Nah, I'm just a fella who see's the world through his own lens and who's reached the point where he's happy enough (foolish enough) to share his musings with other's. As I write this it 0525 in the morning and I woke up thinking about young women. I my God that sounds soooo creepy. Let me rephrase; I woke up thinking about how this world has become a really tough place for many of them. I work with a lot of incredibly capable and talented young souls, and I'm consistently in awe of just how smart and hard working they are. Yet I've also noticed that a fair few, beneath the surface, seem to be carrying some inner sadness. Now I could be wrong on so many levels about this, but I think the way the world is today makes it really hard for a young women to find peace and contentment, and I think there are several reasons for that. I'm only going to focus on one today, though, because I suspect that if they could crack this nut then so much more would fall into place. So I'm just going to come out and say it; I think you need to get better at loving yourself. Better at being less judgemental about how you look, what you say, what you've done or not done. Better at not comparing yourself against all those either bright young things out there. You seem to find it so hard to find the good in yourself and you measure yourself against impossible standards. To be sure, there will always be someone out there more beautiful and clever and quick witted, but that doesn't mean you're not awesome. You really need to see the epic in yourself, to appreciate your own intrinsic self worth. And this has to be an inside job. No amount of compliments or affirmation or encouragement from other's is going to give you that, although of course it's nice to be on the end of these things. But YOU need to learn to love YOU. You need to understand just what a force of nature you are. What you bring to the world. I think I know a little about what makes an amazing women because I'm married to one. And this much I know, there is so much to be gained by finding a place where you learn to cherish yourselves. God, as I write this I'm so conscious of not wanting to preach, hence the self mocking title. It's just sometimes I can look at a person and I can see their inner sadness. And it's often those that on the surface would appear to have it all. Beautiful, clever, kind and empathic women. You judge yourself so harshly. You seem to hold yourself in such low regard. I really think you need to learn not to, and to be less hasty to self convict. Now I know there's not much point in me telling you to be less physically self conscious but its me so I'm going to do it anyway. You're cool, OK? Bloody great, actually. And you need not apologise to the world for who you are. Oh heck I'm bound to get flack for even going here but in a world that's so full of judgement, the art of self appreciation has never been more important. Doesn't matter how many Instagram likes you get, or how frequently people swipe left or right or whatever the fuck they do on internet dating sites. No amount of praise from the outside is going to bring you peace unless you can learn to like yourself. So please be gentler with you. Be kinder with you. Be better at meeting your own needs and recognising when you're not doing that. One of the most attractive qualities in a well balanced women is when they reach this apex. It actually applies to guys too, although as one of those lesser creatures I think we're probably better at thinking less and just going with it. So all this is really to do no more than suggest, to implore, that it is absolutely fine to be you. In fact, push the boat out, learn to cherish your feminine power and wiles and poise and intellect. It's an absolute force of nature. And one more thing; we live in a world where we spend so much time "Doing" and not enough time "Being". Don't underestimate the power of "Being", those moments when you stop and pause and take it all in. And once you've surfaced for breath keep being kind to yourself. Lavish upon your own wellbeing, and make it one of those good kind of habits that you form. You're cool, remember? More than cool, actually. Now bugger off and stop reading this tripe. . . .

1 comment:

  1. This reminded me of a quote from a novel which really resonated with me recently:

    "Other people's judgement doesn't have any power unless you offer yourself up for trial, so don't"... "I'd been offering up myself up for trial my whole life, determining myself by what my parents said about me, whether men wanted me, whether (people) accepted me. It never crossed my mind that I had a choice in teh matter" The Prayer Box by Lisa Wingate

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