I Picked A Side

I do not think I could be any more disgusted having spent the last several hours ingesting the events that unfolded at the #LetWomenSpeakAuckland rally yesterday. For the unenlightend, a baying mob of radical trans activists, ably assisted by their female handmaids, breached the barriers and proceeded to assault, abuse, and threaten a small gathering of biological women who had come to a public space to share there concerns at the erosion of their safe spaces. This violent horde, consisting mostly of trans women, threw soup at the primary speaker, and created a threatening and expletive strewn wall around these women, eventually causing the shutdown of the entire event. I have already posted a video to my Facebook and Twitter pages today, and if you haven't already please fast forward to around the 26 minute mark and then watch how things unfold. And once you have, can one of you tell me why I, or anybody else, should feel under any obligation to support trans rights after this? Now I'm frequently disgusted at how many of my fellow men go about their business on a day to day basis, and lo and behold it appears that even the one's that claim to be women can't quite shake those masculine urges to dominate, control, and subjugate. What I see when I see this footage is the patriarchy in female garb. I see mysogyny of the highest order. To those of you who chant Trans Women are Women, the obvious question i have is "Really?", and "Are you sure?", because what I see is a group of bullies manifesting the worst traits of the worst kind of men. I am, not to put to finer point on it, enraged. Women fought long and hard for rights that were denied them. And to see pretend women bullying and belittling real women makes me sick to my core. So henceworth I am standing squarely and solely for women. I am standing with women. I will defend, in whatever capacity they require, their rights and entitlements. I will waste not one iota of my time on the men who claim to be women. They have, by their actions, eroded any compassion I might have had. Today I saw violence. I saw a crowd actively seeking to humiliate and silence actual biological women. So I'm done with the fake one's. I'm out. That's not to say I wish them harm or misfortune as this is not how I'm wired. It's just I've picked the side that really needs upholding. The savage irony is that this vast horde could be seen to be carrying banners with the slogan "Be Kind" on them. One has to marvel at such short term memory loss. One could almost be forgiven for suspecting that these counter protestors don't actually believe what they say? So today I am drawing clear blue water between myself and them. I'm handing in my support for their cause. You've rendered yourselves impossible to stand alongside. In Gods name did you not stop to think about the optics of this? Social media is blowing up further to these scenes, with JK Rowling leading the charge. In my life I have tried to consider all sides, and seek to better understand the grievances of minorities as they seek to gain recognition and equality. But I cannot, and will not stand back as an impartial observer whilst I see things such as I have today. I would be a coward to do so. If this seems to you like a rant then you are not mistaken. It is absolutely, emphatically a rant. And I invite those of you to pick a side if you have not already done so. Look at the facts on the ground. Seek to dissect truth from hyperbole. If you do, it will become apparent that we have allowed a mistruth to flourish. A man cannot change into a women, nor a woman into a man. These are brute facts everybody on the planet accepted until about five minutes ago.

Radical Trans Activists And Their Female Enablers

Its quite the phenomena. There's a cohort of women, statistically white liberal and in their 20's, that appear to be very willing to act unwittingly against their own self interest. In much the same way as Aunt Lydia acts against the interests of women in The Handmaids Tale. Why is this? And why am I concerned? Well I have been in a Twitter spat with one such female and it has been a real eye opener. Stylishly, her opening gambit was to call me Nazi, which I think fits the definition of going in hot. I pointed out that people who deploy that slur must have no understanding of the terrible history of the real Nazi's, but in truth I already knew it was simply a declaration of ignorance on her part. But back to my central question; when I reflect how long and hard biological women have had to fight to be heard, to be seen, to rise up against casual male oppression it staggers me that there are females who speak and act in such a manner that actively undermines this. And this is the part where the radical trans activist comes into the mix. Please note that I draw very clear blue water between this bunch and genuine and reasonable members of the trans community. The latter just want to live authentically and have the right to do so, accepting that consessions have to be made so as not to violate the existing rights of biological women. I support every last sensible member of the trans community. They absolutely exist and deserve to live free from fear and bigotry. Yet for the radical and vocal cohort there appears to be a demand that biological women abandon their rights to privacy. To have their safe spaces violated by biological males who identify as trans. They have to quietly submit and remain silent when hulking great trans women dominate formerly female exclusive sports. How ghastly must it be for a young female who has worked to excel in swimming or rugby or any other sport to suddenly find themselves facing a fully intact male in the pool or on the field. Youtube has an absolute carnival of horrors if you want to see female fighters being pulverised by other "women". It's a horrible sight to behold. And what about the Let Women Speak Rally's? A designated space in which women, often the victims of rape and other forms of domestic violence are given a platform to speak in public, only to be shouted down by trans activist ghouls, many of whom are young biological females themselves. It's difficult for me to regard these girls as anything other than enablers to the violent men who stand alongside them. There's a real Aunt Lydia element to this. Actual women aligning with violent men who identify as female whilst often masked and concealed. As a man I regard this as nothing less than bullying. These activists appear intent on silencing the voices of real women. Intent on trying to intimidate them into submission. In effect, men who are pretend women whilst simultaneously displaying the worst qualities of the worst men. Of all the tactics I was not expecting the patriarchy to deploy, it was for them to don dresses and nylons whilst violating and seeking to erode the safe spaces of embattled and often vulnerable women. So lets be clear on where I stand. My first and utmost allegiance is to actual biological females. They get first dibs on my empathy and concern. Then comes the kind and gentle and also vulnerable trans people who themselves have suffered from oppression and their fair share of violence. As for the trans activists, this vicious and patriarchal cohort of dominant men along with their white liberal 20 something handmaids, you don't get a jot of sympathy. I do not wish you harm but I do not support you. I absolutely stand against any twisted ideology that seeks to usurp the rights and dash the dreams of real women. Women who deserve a voice. Women who help make our world richer and more vibrant. Who make things better.

Know Your Own Radar

Nobody ever messes around with me. Nobody tries to bully or threaten or intimidate me. I literally never, and I mean never get those kinds of issues. And I wonder why? I'm not particularly large, nor aggressive, or confrontational. I don't think I act in a way that is menacing or intimidating. So why is it? Well I have come to the conclusion that its likely a combination of how I carry myself and how I tend not to play games. Anybody who has contact with me is going to get the real version, whatever that happens to be. I feel no need to try to impress you, or win you over, or demonstrate how amazing I am. I don't have much in the way of insecurities, or any axes to grind. I just feel liberated to be who I am on my terms. It wasn't always this way. As an overweight teen I had plenty of angst. I'd worry that nobody would find me attractive, or want to spend time with me, and that I would never really amount to anything. Feelings common to most teens, I expect. Yet as you go through life and as you mature then life has the tendency to show you what is important, to signpost you towards the things that are of real value. And if you are paying attention you grow to understand your strengths and capabilities and begin to play to them. Now I'm a good communicator. That's a brute fact. I can write and I can talk and I can make myself be understood. But that's just the half of it. In order to be a really good communicator you need a good radar. You need to be able to listen, to lean into trying to understand what other's think and why. Doesn't mean you have to agree with them and it doesn't even commit you to empathise. Yet I'd argue you will find, when you really spend time to listen to somebody you will see their humanity, and when you see that it somehow smoothes the way. So coming full circle and considering the opening line of this blog, the reason I don't think anybody messes with me is because they don't have to. You just need to be you and I expect we'll get on fine. All that said, throughout the course of my job I am often required to be very firm with the public when they do come on strong. I have a very simple and effective principle that I deploy in these cases. First you make clear what your concern is around their conduct, and then provide a very clear consequence should it persist. And what's massively important is that if it does the consequence needs to be deployed. It's so frustrating when I hear colleagues give frequent warnings and then never follow through. By the way the same principle often works with kids. Sometimes people need boundaries in order to overcome their baser natures, so put the boundaries in place. It's not so much about control as it is setting up the grounds for effective communication. Say what you're going to do and then do what you say. Every time. People will soon get the measure of you, and more importantly they will confidently know where they stand.