The Core Of Me

Around a quarter of a century ago i was sat in the office of my then managing director. I forget the reason why. I was asked what I wanted from my life, or a question along similar lines. I replied "I want to live my life without doing so at the expense of other people." To this day I do not know whether this was what he had been expecting to hear, but he was impressed. As I think back I am clear that nothing has changed. I do not expect to have anything handed to me, or to be given unfair advantage over others. I expect to have to work hard everyday and feel strongly that respect must be earned and never assumed. Quite why I am thinking about this today is unclear to me. Perhaps I'm just going through a reflective stage? Suffice to say that the principles I held then I still hold. They exist like a plumb line running down the centre of my life. In so many other ways I have changed however, yet I remain fiercely loyal to the importance of honesty and truth. I do not worry too much whether people actually like me, but I would hope that they know that when I speak they can expect me to be truthful. People who build a web of lies around themselves must live lives of constant anxiety. Always having to remember the narrative, always at risk of saying something which blows the whole charade wide open. No, I cannot live this way. It's corrosive from the inside out. Another thing I've been reflecting on is about those times I have been wrong. I mean there's no shortage. I expect I shall continue to be wrong about a great many things, but just so long as I'm on a path that leads me to eventually being right then I'm fine with that. I'm not one to avoid controversial issues either because I find them fascinating. These days they are sometimes referred to as 3rd rail subjects. The 3rd rail is the one in the centre of the railway line which electrocutes you should you lick it or pee on it. I do not suggest you test this theory. One thing I sense is that there is a lot of fear about controversial issues. Be critical of scams like BLM and you are racist. Dare to suggest that biological men cannot be women and you are a transphobe. Hot potatoes to be sure, but when we cower from them it empowers the zealots, and that's a road that leads nowhere good. To sum this up the message of this blog is as follows; seek to do no harm, and have no fear of being wrong, and be brave. Talking of the latter, you do realise that just talking about being brave is not actually brave. The only way to be brave is to do brave things. Just as the only way to have a clear conscience is to live truthfully and without deceit. These are not mere concepts; they are conscious choices that we all have to make. Now I'm not a wise man but this much I know. Never lose the hunger of discovery. Discovery about yourself, about others, about the way they world is. Try not to carry too much fear with you because that's baggage you just don't need. And beyond that try to enjoy the journey, which as you shall discover is so brief and so precarious. And help other's to enjoy it, too.