On Resilience

I once wrote, in respect of our children, that if we protect them from everything we prepare them for nothing. It sounds harsh, yet I wonder if I'm onto something? I wonder whether we, and by we I mean society, has created a space that is almost too safe? This is not to say we should be seeking to terrorise our kids about the realities of existence, but I suspect the pendulum may have swung too far. For what it's worth here's my view; the universe doesn't care about you, and it owes us neither happiness or good fortune. It has no opinions on whether we flourish or not. So from that understanding what to do? Well I'd hazard that working together gives us the greatest chance of achieving something during our brief tenure here, and in order to do that it's probably a good idea if we all try to look outward. I don't know about you, but I can be really self consumed and inward looking from time to time, and I have to force myself to look beyond myself. I do try to genuinely ask how people are, and I am prepared if they don't just say fine, too. Yet despite this I'm never really far from selfishness, which is not a trait I like about myself. But back to today's central point; resilience. How can we better prepare our kids for life's oddities? Well I'm a for the real approach. I don't want to sugar coat anything, but I do want them to know that there will always be a home and a harbor for them. I also want to encourage them to be outward looking, to see others and hear them and acknowledge that as much as we'd like to we don't walk these paths alone. I have concerns that we have inadvertently placed such an emphasis on the "I" that we have neglected the "We". Perhaps that's just me projecting my own failings, and I'm certainly not the best example of altruism. I can be selfish, mean spirited, and self serving, but if I have any saving grace I'm not blind to it. I see my faults. I live them. I wish I was a better and kinder man in so many ways. On the plus side, I have chosen to engage in this inner feud each morning and compel myself to do the right thing, to be that person I aspire to. I expect I shall fail more often than I succeed, and wonder what the actual point is on my worse days. Yet deep down I know, and I'd suggest you do too, that the best way to clear the weeds is to take to them with a scythe of honest reflection. Because once we've cleared the way we can see better, and if we can see better we are usually better informed, and being better informed beats ignorance hands down. So no easy answers then. Just a daily choice, a commitment. Fuck it, I really wish there was an easier way. . .